Hello World…Spiritual Depth Precept # 13

I was given more strength than I knew possible for a live human being.  We had just taken on  more than we could understand but God understands all things and knows what is best for each person to find their way to him. 

Tail/head:  At age, 15, I had gone to church with a friend. Had never been to church in a regular manner; just occasionally with Granny as a little child. No understanding of what was said or done and frankly didn’t like it much at all.  I only went with my friend because she begged me so she would not have to go by herself. I don’t remember anything that took place that night except she pushed me into the aisle when an invitation to come to the front was given and I was so scared not to go with her that I walked down front and stood still as the pastor asked each person, “Do you believe the Lord to be your savior? and do you want to join the church?”  I just shook my head like everyone else and in a few minutes everyone was shaking hand and patting each other on the back. Then we went home. I went to Sunday School with her a couple of times after that but that was not fun either so I quit going and never went back.

Years later, after I was married and   lost 2 babies, I went kind of weird. I didn’t like or want to talk to anyone. People made me mad and when I got mad, I was really bad. My husband liked the bad me because he was bad all the time anyway. He liked the sparing mouth that could come back with as good as he gave. He told me he loved the excitement that came from the ‘fights’ we had. Nothing physical, just arguments that got loud and sparing. We could spend an hour fussing about nothing and then go to the movies and have pop-corn and coke, laugh like nothing happened and go home to bed and love one another like Romeo and Juliet.  That went on for years after I lost the second baby. Then my life changed again. I found a job working 3 to 11, Monday thru Friday. He worked  10 p.m. to 6 a.m. so we never saw one another for a while. Just weekends.  One day at work, all tails, and no  love for anyone except my husband and not much of that on bad days, I was sitting behind the counter getting ready to read a book when the worse storm blew up suddenly. It was about 4:30 and the clouds moved in, dark and rolling and filled with lightning and thunder. The wind was blowing so hard, the doors to the dry cleaner where I worked kept opening and rain poured onto the cement floor. I closed and locked the front washer door, mopped the floors dry and pushed a large trashcan against the other door that buzzed when it opened.  I sat down behind the counter to read when sudden there was a man dressed in a white lamb skin coat, red flannel shirt, blue jeans and white tennis shoes standing right in front of the counter. It was raining like a hurricane outside but he was dry as a bone. He had black curly hair, dark skin and the bluest blue eyes I had ever seen. It was like looking at the sky on a clear cloudless day. His teeth looked like a string of white pearls when he smiled and I thought to myself, he is the  most beautiful  man I have ever seen in my life. He began to take his coat off as he spoke, asking me if I would sew his pocket back on his coat because it was cold outside and his hands were cold. He asked how much it cost to do that. I told him and he said he didn’t have any money. So I volunteered to do it and pay for it myself. I was a little bit scared because we were alone  and no one had come in since I had gotten to work.  I rushed to the back and got sewing needle and thread, sat down and began to try to sew it. He leaned back against the window and began to talk:   (short version)

“Did you know that some people worship rocks?  some trees, some even worship the dead. In India they worship cows, in Russia, many don’t want to believe in God. In Africa, some tribes worship animals, the sky, the moon, you would not believe what some people worship. Some people are just religious and don’t worship anything. They are dead as doorknobs. You don’t worship, do you? I mean,  you don’t believe in God, do you? ….. You don’t like to talk about it either, do you?  But you like to read books! What is your favorite book?  I had not answered a single question, but I said to the last one;   ‘Gone with the Wind’.      What kind of books do you like best?    ‘Novels’

Why was this taking so long to sew this stupid pocket on this dumb coat? I did it already 2 weeks ago and I know what to do but I can’t find these stupid little holes and I don’t want to hear this: I wanted to yell at him to go away, yet I didn’t. I wanted to see him disappear like magic, like he had appeared. I wanted to know what he was doing here asking me stupid questions, but I was afraid to ask,  I was afraid, but I wasn’t.

Then he changed the subject. “Do you know where a Christian book store is?”   I told him yes there was one about 1/2 mile from my house, close enough to walk to, but I had never been there. Why was he asking?  He told me he wanted me to read a book and he said, “If you will read it, you will never see me again here.” I asked him the name of the book because I would read anything to get rid of him. He told me the name of the book wasSatan is Alive and Living on Planet Earth,  and it was written by Hal Lindsey. He told me that Hal Lindsey knew God and if I would read it, I promise you will never see me here again.  When I agreed, he said, “Great, Remember, religion will kill you, but relationship with the Lord Jesus Christ will give you eternal life.”

I tied the knot and said softly  in a whisper, you better stay on this coat this time. I laid the coat on the counter and as I did, a pencil rolled off the counter. I reached down to pick it up and I knew before I stood up that he would not be there, yet it scared me.  As I grabbed my coat, pocketbook and turned off the lights, leaving work before I was supposed to get off all I could hear was, “if you read it, you will never see me here again.’

Shorter version:  Next day I bought the book, read it and while reading it I came across a paragraph stating that you didn’t have to believe every thing to get saved. You had to believe Gods’ report of His Son; that Jesus died on the cross for your sin, confess that you were a sinner and ask Jesus to come into your heart and believe by faith that Jesus did it and is living in your heart and you will be saved.  I prayed the sinners prayer written on the page and as I finished, I said, “I believe’ and immediately I knew and felt this intense heat like hot oil pour down into the top of my head, the heat went from the top of my head to the bottom of my feet from finger tip to finger tip and I could not move. I laughed and cried and this burning on the inside/chilling on the outside  oil ran up and down through me for several minutes and suddenly it stopped and I heard a voice say to me:

“I will never leave you nor forsake you. You are mine and I AM yours forever.” From that moment to this, He has never left me, never forsaken me, carried me through this life to grow me up in Him to know Him and His ability to see me through sickness, death, life, love, good times, bad times, horrible time and I have learned that whatever condition my life is in to be content. It has not come to stay, it has come to pass. Tomorrow We will be having another new day, learning, growing, giving, praying going to the next day.  The peace that He gives me in difficult times like loosing my Daddy and my Daughter and my brother. The strength He gives me every time my husband had a heart-attack or surgery on his heart. The healing of my body when staff infection invaded my sinus, the grace and mercy when stalked by persons unknown, the care when there was no money to pay bills or buy groceries, the joy of an adopted daughter, the joy of 8 little children I kept. The joy of Hope. Hope was and is another baby He sent my way when she was 3 weeks old and needed love and someone to take care of her. She still is the joy of my life. She came the day she found out about the death of my adopted daughter and stayed all day with me, just loving on me and holding my hand and telling me:  “It is going to be alright Mama 2”. She always called me “mama 2” because when she was old enough to understand, I told her I was not her real mother but I was her mama two during the day watching over her for her really mother who picked her up at 6 p.m. and would bring her back at 6 a.m. She has her own babies now and they call me Granny.

to be continued…..

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